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Why do men come back after leaving? Leaving can sound easy on paper, but there are always drawbacks. Men come back to the special person that’s inspired their life and lost it because they feel like they don’t deserve it. When they leave and distances become too much, they need to reacquire the happiness that is rightfully theirs before someone steals it away.
With this in mind, a guy feels powerful and independent when they break up with their girlfriend. Emotionally, they’re looking to be loved that way in order to feel fulfilled and commit fully. As time goes on, the more their feelings fade away, the weaker it makes them feel. This leads to instability in relationships.
The theory of a man leaving and then coming back works in some situations, but it also hurts them. Men realize this as they encounter pain when their significant other leaves, which forces them to consider their former ex-partners and the times when he wasn’t hurting.
Bringing themselves back into the plans of those they view in a positive light not only makes them feel better about themselves but also increases their chance of getting that same person to commit back to them. All they have to do is message them, apologize to them, and commit to talking.
If your ex or exes have dumped you and they are now coming back, this is a sign that they regret the decision. They realize there’s more to life than being with someone and it doesn’t work out.
Men find it hard to cope with leaving their ex, so they come back because they feel more comfortable in the relationship. This is helpful for them to move on with their lives as they can turn to their happy time and make it last.
But in the case of men, what could be the reason why they come back? Men may come back for their significant other, their children, or another woman. Here are 12 possible motivations for coming back and what you can do to move forward accordingly.
1. He misses you and other things
When men turn their backs on you, they do it for a reason, years down the road when they’re feeling nostalgic. Maybe he saw something that reminded him of you, or maybe he just received some news recently. Either way, in his heart he wants you back. Maybe being with another person is off the table because of who he used to be when with you. That’s why your ex wants to come back – because he misses the old him before it all went downhill.
Make sure that you and the other person are of equal standing and you truly want to give it another try, then go for it. If you’ve got one final try before breaking up permanently, take it. Remember: listen to your gut!
Sometimes relationships with people who are wrong for us really suck, but we have the power to let go and try to find the right one down the line. Instead of trying to cling on to someone else and forget about ourselves, it’s okay – and even healthy – to end things when it’s too hard.
2. He comes back because he feels too guilty to leave
Reconnecting with an ex after a breakup can be really tricky, but often, they might be sorry they left and are trying to apologize. While someone might start to obsessively stalk their partner during a breakup or try making plans to get back together immediately, they may also feel that it takes time for someone’s behavior and emotions to change.
A man might leave you in a very emotional state, but feel only relief when he gets home. He might think about how awful he feels or how miserable his decision was and want to come back to make amends.
Contrary to popular opinion, men don’t easily give up on a relationship with a woman they care about unless there is a good reason to. If you are in the midst of an intimate disagreement and still want to talk things out when you’re ready, tell him that if he can respect your wishes and give you some time, you’ll see him soon.
You can decide not to reply by either inadvertently brushing it aside, pretending that the conversation didn’t happen, or just telling him that you enjoy knowing he cared enough after all those years of ignoring you. There are no rules for what to do in this situation; it’s up to you.
3. His plans of playing the field didn’t go as planned
Men feel more comfortable being single if they miss support from their ex. Having a break from their partner can give men the opportunity to re-evaluate themselves and understand why they’ve been feeling like they need someone else in the first place.
However, this doesn’t mean that you should automatically be excited. There are many reasons he might come back, and it can take weeks rather than days for you to believe that he’s genuinely there for good. Until then, try to focus on your daily routines so you don’t fall back into old habits and the other person doesn’t feel like they have to do anything in order to make the first date work.
It’s always confusing when men who have previously had sexual relationships go back to you. What are their intentions, can you trust that they didn’t sleep around, and do you want to take them back regardless of whatever happened in their past affairs? These are the questions you must ask yourself before replying.
He will need to show his spouse respect, listen when something is bothering him, and assure you on a daily basis that you are the #1 priority in his life.
4. He wants what he can’t have
If you’ve broken up with a bad guy, he may be noticing your improved mental, emotional, and physical health. You don’t need to continue to live in an abusive relationship just because you’re afraid of being alone and that your self-esteem has only gone down over time. Breakups are tough, but this is your break! You can improve yourself without him by focusing on the positives of being happy, strong, and beautiful.
Firstly, some men might need a good ego cleansing after they’ve left. They might take the time to themselves, to think about what they could have done differently in their previous relationship and if leaving was actually a mistake before trying to come back
Guys who break your heart can cheat on you again and come running back after being crushed. As hard as it is for them to admit it, sometimes chicks were not meant for one guy, even if he does physically fit your criteria.
Sometimes, we do go through the crazy pain to reconnect with exes and get them back. But it shouldn’t be only your decision. Sometimes, they may want to contact you again if they feel as if they can’t move on without closure and want to feel wanted at least once in their life again before they die alone.
With newfound independence and success, it’s no surprise that someone else will want to pursue you and your new lifestyle. Sadly, a lot of these men are lost causes. Don’t give them another chance, they just don’t understand the changes in their former ‘special’ position in your life.
It will be driving him crazy that he lost you, and it will fuel his desire for you even more. He feels so deprived and devastated that you closed the door on him, and now thinks of your every move when contemplating why he doesn’t have anything like that.
For some, it might not be worth risking all of the time, love, and effort you spent working to rebuild your life when a relationship might blare back in your face. For others, it would be devastating if they were unable to recover from this heartbreak.
5. He was wrong about this second option
It’s easy to see that his relationship with his new woman hasn’t worked out, and he wants to come back to you. It takes a genius to future out that his cheating side-chick might not be enough.
If someone says that they want you back, it doesn’t mean you are going to be happy with the relationship or that you are what is best for them. You need to determine if his intentions for you are genuine or if he has given up on finding happiness with someone else or wanting a different woman from the one that left.
“I just want a safety net because I hurt my ego and might feel like I’ll be really insecure if someone new comes along,” is one too-common reason why men may come back to people after being on the outs.
6. He realizes hard times that toughened him up and helped him re-enter
He might not have left you for someone else, but he found another relationship quickly after the breakup. However, mid-strife remembers you and says “I don’t want this” and comes back.
Based on limited comparisons, he might feel distraught that you might be even better than the other person. At this point, he should be coming back to you, formally. Femininity may be an advantage that makes the man keep remembering about you.
People come back after leaving to have a better understanding of themselves and how they would benefit their current partner. New relationships often go better if a person leaves and then realizes how much they missed their old partner.
Times apart can help each person to realize where the other wants the most-clarity of mind, understanding, and an unconditional desire to spend your life together. In this scenario, he might be returning in light of a realization that he wasn’t acting as honest with you as he could have, but this time you know better.
Instead of letting your partner cheat again, he will have to fight through their emotions and demonstrate to you that he is striving towards showing that he appreciates you instead of putting the easy life on a pedestal like before.
7. His friends or family pressured him to
Why do men come back after leaving? We’ve all been there, and we’ve all heard some variation of “He just needs time.” After an end-of-relationship argument and glum months, friends and family say you should try again with the bad boy.
If your ex-partner comes back to you months after they left, they may just be fed up with seeing you miserable or they’ve reached the logical conclusion that trying again may be worth the gamble. Maybe they really do want to work things out and want to give it another shot.
Maybe he’s been told by several friends and family members that you were a blessing and the best thing that ever happened to him. If he’s tried to make it alone, however, it’s just been miserable not knowing how to move on from his ex, so maybe he’ll come back if he has a bit of encouragement
If your ex mysteriously appears after months of no contact, don’t worry. This is a possibility.
8. Feelings of loneliness prompt men to find love
Why do men come back after leaving? The simple answer: loneliness. Most of us would be willing to do anything to avoid an event where you are the only one that is assured a good time—regardless of what led up to the decision to leave.
He could be feeling rubbish about himself after the breakup, hoping someone will compliment him. Alternatively, he could just not be ready to settle down yet and be clinging to you in order to fill that emptiness.
If he comes back to you after scarring off for a few days and you jump at his communications, it might just be because you were desperate to hear from him and he wanted to reappear in your life so that he could again feel wanted. So if this is the case, don’t expect any long-term commitment from him.
He might want to return to get back the affection and attention that he believes you were pushing him out of. He is hoping that in striving for love, he will earn once more getting the acceptance back. On the other hand, sometimes they may have experienced some tough times, and they’re just looking for reassurance.
9. He spent time working on his emotions
When an ex reappears after a break from communication from when he or she left months ago, many of our problems can be solved. If this man has truly worked on himself during that time, we have a lot of respect for him for doing so.
A man leaves but comes back to the woman he loves and values his mental space. The challenge for him is deciding to come back so that he can focus on the woman who needs him best: himself.
A man that comes back after leaving might actually deserve another chance. If they put in the work to change their actions and lifestyle, they might be a better option now than when you broke up.
If you have broken up with them and they come back crawling in a few months, it might be because they grew out of that lifestyle phase. They still care about preserving the relationship with you so make sure you consider their feelings as well.
Factors that determine whether men come back after leaving, such as money status, unhealthy habits, and commitment to their partner, are relevant for analysis. However, if you see a man change his life for the better and are willing to dedicate himself, your feelings toward him may change.
Now, let’s take the relationship a step further by asking how much you think your significant other is willing to commit. If he quit smoking three days ago, don’t trust him too quickly! He might not be willing to truly make the long-term sacrifices needed to make things work.
10. He just wants to hook-up again
Knowing your worth and keeping yourself happy is easier than you think. If you think you deserve better, those good boys will come back in the future for more of what you have to offer.
You don’t need to waste your time on him just because of his wish. If he cares about your emotion, he didn’t leave you. Why does he want to hook up? Any reasons that can convince you to give him another chance? You don’t know the hidden reason behind his behavior since men require a lot from women. It’s better for you to ask him directly.
11. He’s confused about the breakup
But it’s also possible that he had strong emotions about the break-up and needed to clear his head, or had a couple of orders while not sobering up. By responding after some time away and contacting their ex more often than they should have, men have found out that their ex will probably still feel hurt even if they did come back after much time.
Men come back after leaving a woman whose relationship that they left didn’t end well, because he needs some clarity. Probably post-relationship breakup calls can help provide closure too!
Overall, this is a very mature approach and is ultimately a healthy way of processing. In order to make sure you are comfortable doing this kind of conversation, find someone you trust who will be non-judgemental.
12. He’s not sure what he wants
Simply because he is not yet sure of his feelings, in the meantime he prefers sullen company over no company at all. He might be hoping to find out things about you and get back together should he change his mind with time.
The basis of this action is unsure, turning into a self-reflective journey for the indecisive man. Without a clear answer, rolling the dice out to see what will happen might be the most logical option.
Sometimes, a man that has left comes back and he may realize that what he wanted was to be with you. When they do decide to come back, it’s usually one-way communication from them. If there are more questions, get in touch and figure out what’s going on for your both.
Breaking up is one thing, but coming back once you do could be even harder. It’s best to just let him go, and come back when you find a guy that makes you feel the same amount of butterflies in your stomach as he did.
Final thoughts why do men come back after leaving?
Remember that friendships can wait, but your emotional health needs more immediate attention. Numerous times in movies, a man and woman can sit in their friend’s circle and watch them fall back in love with them. The movie doesn’t show that it is typically a reaction to some unfavorable event or situation.
Don’t embrace the past if it’ll prevent you from living into your future. Friendships can wait, but your health is never a sacrifice.
Girls! Did you know you can use a simple ‘reverse psychology’ technique to make your ex want you back? If you want to see how well this sneaky method actually works, just watch this very short video. You will find your way.
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